Judge Brett Kavanaugh (Matt Damon) takes questions from Senators Chuck Grassley (Alex Moffat), Diane Feinstein (Cecily Strong), Amy Klobuchar (Rachel Dratch), Thom Tillis (Mikey Day), Cory Booker (Chris Redd), John Kennedy (Kyle Mooney), Sheldon Whitehouse (Pete Davidson), Lindsey Graham (Kate McKinnon) and prosecutor Rachel Mitchell (Aidy Bryant).
The show aired a mock-PSA from the Democratic National Committee, showing Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, Dianne Feinstein and various congressional figures acknowledging the nation’s cravings for a new party direction. Still, that isn’t stopping the old guard from making promises about how their leadership can totally still win elections, learn from their mistakes, and focus on the important things, like “converting Confederate monuments into statues of prominent lesbian poets.”
Even Kate McKinnon‘s Hillary Clinton appears in the promo, asking America for another chance at the presidency.
The New York Times recaps:
If Donald J. Trump’s first news conference as president-elect was a raucous, chaotic affair on Wednesday – and it was – the parody of it on “Saturday Night Live” was somehow calmer and more organized than the actual event.
Still, the “S.N.L.” sketch pulled few punches as it swung at the show’s most powerful, persistent critic, mocking Mr. Trump on a range of subjects, including the perceived lack of star power at his coming inauguration; his opaque plan to divest himself from his businesses; and the possibility that Russia possessed unverified compromising information on him.
Saturday night’s episode, the first new one of 2017, once again featured Alec Baldwin as Mr. Trump. He started off the faux news conference by vowing to answer what he said was “the question that’s on everyone’s mind.”
“Yes, this is real life,” he said. “This is really happening. On January 20, I, Donald J. Trump, will become the 45th president of the United States.” He continued: “And then, two months later, Mike Pence will become the 46th.”
“I’m in, how about you?” Pointing, “urine, urine, urine. …”
On last night’s Saturday Night Live Kate McKinnon and Fred Armisen played Microsoft employees who present a robot at a tech conference. Not only does the robot increase office productivity, but it’s gay. But the robot just can’t stop talking about how much he enjoys looking at attractive men.
When asked why Microsoft made the robot gay McKinnon responds, “Why not?”
Armisen jumps in to point out that it’s 2016 and office robots can be gay if they want to be.
Is the skit funny? Sterotping and offensive? Or just a waste of SNL airtime?
You be the judge.
Now I’ve heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don’t really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew her
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah
You say I took the name in vain
I don’t even know the name
But if I did, well really, what’s it to you?
There’s a blaze of light
In every word
It doesn’t matter which you heard
The holy or the broken Hallelujah
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah
Last night on Saturday Night Live, host Adam Driver played Dr. Rockhard, a physician living inside a early ’90s. gay porn movie. The trouble is, he can’t seem to get any time alone with his patient because of an insistent little girl with stomach problems.
I could have sworn he was going to say Pro-boner.
Ben Affleck (looking beary beefy) and the cast of Saturday Night Live ruthlessly and hysterically mocked the “ex-gay movement” last night in the skit “New Beginnings”
Affleck stars as summer camp counselor Marvin, who is trying to ‘cure’ the kids from being gay at “New Beginnings” a gay reform camp in Flagstaff, Arizona, who says things like “Hetero is better, yo.”
Among the camp attendees are the delightfully flamboyant Moynihan, Thompson, Tim Robinson, and Aidy Bryant.
Best line of the skit had to be Affleck’s Marvin talking about movie night showing of the ‘The Outsiders’
“Look at Ralph Macchio’s pillow lips. This is going to be a disaster”
“How many times do people get pregnant from rape? It’s point zero zero one percent. It’s a joke. I read lots of articles. I know people, because I’m 53. I’ve know a lot of people, and I’ve actually never known anyone who got pregnant from being raped. And guess what? If I got raped, I would have the baby. And if I didn’t want to keep it because I had these [mocking tone] horrible nightmares, I would adopt it out. But I think that God can turn a bad thing into a good thing. And that, if I got raped and a beautiful baby who was innocent was born out of it, that would be a blessing.”
Victoria Jackson, speaking at the RNC to Michelangelo Signorile. Hit the link for the audio
According to Planned Parenthood, more than 5% of all (reported) rapes (more than 22,000 cases) result in unwanted pregnancies. But you know what the number shouldn’t matter, though. If only one of those women would want to abort the pregnancy she should have the right to do so, without questions and without being crucified by a bunch of self-righteous crazy loons like Victoria Jackson, Todd Adkin and the Republican Party.
And to the 12th Season SNL which Jakson starred on: Nora Dunn, Jon Lovitz, A. Whitney Brown, Dennis Miller, Dana Carvey, Jan Hooks, and Kevin Nealon don’t you think its time you publicly call out this loony bitch?