Tag Archives: friendship

Too Adorable! Ian McKellen To Officiate Patrick Stewart’s Wedding

Gay Geeks rejoice! Fans of Marvel’s X-Men series have always taken notice of the complex love/hate relationship of Professor Charles Xavier and Magneto in both the original comics/animated series as well as the live action movies. But the actors Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart’s real life bromance is anything but complicated. The two have been friends for ages, even so much that McKellen is slated to officiate Stewart’s upcoming nuptials later this year! Here’s more:

This is going to be one handsome wedding. Lord Of The Rings and X-Men star Sir Ian McKellen will be officiating friend and fellow actor Sir Patrick Stewart’s upcoming wedding.

McKellen made the announcement on the Jonathan Ross Show, a UK talk show.

“I’m going to marry Patrick,” he quipped on the show. Stewart, 71, will be marrying jazz singer Sunny Ozzell, 35, the two have been romantically linked since 2009.

While McKellen and Stewart play mutant rivals Magneto and Professor Xavier in the X-men films, the two are actually close friends. According to McKellen’s Twitter account the duo will be appearing in a number of plays together this year as well as in the upcoming, X-Men: Days Of Future Past.

McKellen also said it wasn’t the first time he’s married people. “I’ve done it once before with two guys having a civil partnership. I was crying my eyes out,” he said on the UK talk show. The Hollywood Reporter points out that in Massachusetts a friend or family member can officiate weddings for a one-time fee.

And no, McKellen will not be wearing his Gandalf robes for the wedding. Sorry geeks.

It goes without saying that McKellen was likely referring to Stewart when he mentioned having supportive friends when he talked about coming out and being an actor last year. Stewart has always been a supporter for LGBT rights so I’m speculating that he would return the favor and officiate for McKellen if he ever so chooses. What a great friendship.

Hey Gays, There’s No Such Thing As Hag In Friendship

willgrace

People always want to analyze the constructs of any community and label each component. We all do in order to understand the unique complexities that structure a culture’s behaviors, customs, and even thought processes. Understanding the mechanics allows us to be able to understand why people are the way we are. And the gay community is no different. We have certain things about us that are a part of our daily lives that help us in one way or another. Often, when asked about what things are involved in our daily lives one thing always comes to mind that makes our experience as gay men truly unique.

Now this is the one accessory that nearly every gay man has in their possession. It serves as a calendar and journal that documents the inner workings of your life in just about every aspect. Most of us, at some point, reference to these record keepers as they are often the ones that help us analyze our lives. No matter how feminine or masculine any gay man claims to be, this is acquired in one way or another and is a part of your daily life. And it always comes in the form of a woman.

This woman does just about everything with you. From picking out clothes to going to night clubs together. Workout together. Eat together then obsess about your weight so you have to go workout together again. You have great movie marathons and dance parties to occupy the lonely nights or just because you love to dance. Road trips and music concerts become your freedom anthems. You cry together over breakups and laugh after your latest conquest in the arena of love. She defends your honor and stands by you

They are most likely one of the first people we tell that we’re gay, if not the first. And even though they have always known they quietly sit as you shed copious amounts of tears and console you, all the while allowing you to tell your story. Even though they will never completely understand what it’s like to be different they do everything in their power to make sure you don’t feel different around them. They let us know that it’s okay to be who we really are and let us know that there is always someone there no matter what anyone else thinks.

Often  they are the voice of reason that talks us through the pained experiences that we encounter every day. Not only do they witness the trials we face as gay men when we are ridiculed and harassed, but also when we are facing that prolific battle of accepting ourselves internally. Because we all know that there is so much more than saying the words “I’m gay” when we come out. They stand there with us to lift our spirits and tend our wounded hearts and egos.

They will rally at our first gay pride parade and compare notes on deciding if the insanely hot guy that walked into the coffee shop plays on our team or team hetero and then have some of the most intricate dialogue to see who’s right. Throughout so many first steps that we take as gay men are greeted by the solace these women provide.

They will listen to you when you both attempt to decipher the biggest mistakes made in both past and current relationships. They will listen for hours on end to the endless mounds of exposition that you give on life because you do not understand why relationships have to be so damn complimented. They simply have a way of making everything in life a little more glamorous.

They grant us a smile just because they want to brighten our day. To assist in the most mundane of tasks to the wildest of adventures. From our resounding victories and conquests in love to the devastating life altering despair of ending relationships, they are there for us. To the casual outside observer, the dynamic of a gay man with a straight woman as best friends would resemble a tv sitcom. And maybe in some ways it is a little like Will & Grace. But it’s not all sunshine and smiles.

When we’ve done something wrong, they won’t let it slide.They will call you out on your crap faster than anyone else. They now when to coddle us and when to tell us to stop feeling sorry for ourselves, to pick up, dust off, and get back in there and fight for what we want. It is not asked for it is demanded because they often see the strength that we are unable to in our more fragile moments. They challenge us to challenge ourselves to be better  men than we once believed.

By now you know who I’m referring to. They are referred as the hags of our communities. And I know there’s another word that goes before that. A word that we are called when we are bullied and beaten and threatened. A three letter word that can haunt some of us for our entire lives because it is associated with being weak. And we are not weak. And neither are the women that stand by us and as a result I refuse to say it, because for me it is a word of disrespect no matter the context.

See these women are not accessories. They are our friends. Too often we lose sight of that and treat these treasures like the latest fad that can be ditched at any time. They are not the sidekick to our superhero complex, there merely to provide some form of comic relief to our overdramatic lives.  These women are in the thick of it right along with us. To many of us they become a never-ending source of strength when we are at some of the most vulnerable times in our lives. These women have a somewhat detailed account of the experiences we go through every day. They love us. So why would we ever degrade the magnitude if their significance by calling them a hag?

I know that most of us do not treat these exemplary women that are in our lives in such vapid fashion. But this is for the ones that do openly, or may not recognize that they do. I also know that it’s about semantics. I know that words only have the power that we allow them to possess. But it still needs to be said from time to time that these magnificent women are not to be the brunt of our jokes whenever we’re feeling vindictive or projecting our own insecurities upon. They do not exist to merely serve our purposes, both deep and superficial in nature. They are not and should never be at our beckon call. They are people just like us. They are not hags. They are our friends. One of the best kind.