Tag Archives: Ewwww

Penthouse Magazine Offers 1 Million Dollar Reward For Trump’s Golden Shower Sex Tape

 

Gizmodo reports:

Russian intelligence agencies allegedly have a video showing several prostitutes who were hired by Donald Trump to urinate on each other. And if this video really exists, then Penthouse, America’s most venerable pornography magazine, is willing to spend $1 million for it. Ridiculous nonsense? Probably. But if you really do have this tape, you could make out like a bandit. You just need to give Penthouse exclusive rights to the tape.

The Wrap’s Debbie Emery got a statement from Penthouse, explaining why the magazine wants the video so badly. Kelly Holland, the CEO of Penthouse, says that they’re not happy with simply printing rumors about Trump. Only by publishing the tape will people be convinced that this actually happened. And as a respectable pornographic institution, they want to get to the bottom of this piss take.

I hear WikiLEAKS has the footage but they are saving it for their own blackmail needs. 

 

Mitt Romney Stiffs Baristas, Offers Them His Half Drunk Hot Chocolate Instead.

Posted today on PatriotBoy Blog comes this story of a friends brother who works as a barista at a Seattle’s Best in a Borders Bookstore in the upscale area known as The Riverwoods, at the mouth of Provo Canyon in Utah and an interesting visit by Mittens that left a bad taste in his mouth.

One day in 2010 the baristas were surprised to see Mitt Romney and his wife come to the counter.

Since they’re both Mormon, neither ordered a coffee drink. They each ordered a hot chocolate and took them… without tipping. It seemed odd for someone so wealthy not to tip, but no one thought of it as a big deal. Baristas usually make less than minimum wage and make their living on tips. I understand that it’s not worth Bill Gates’ time to pick up a hundred dollar bill, but Mr. Millionaire couldn’t dump his change in the tip jar?

The man was out of touch…

…only they didn’t know just how out of touch he was until later.

Romney spent some time in the coffee shop as his wife browsed through books before they were called to leave.

On their way out, Anne throws away her half-consumed hot chocolate, but Mitt approaches the counter. “I know you guys can’t sell this again, but I was wondering if one of you guys wanted the rest of my hot chocolate.”

“No thanks,” one of the other baristas told him, wondering if this was some sort of bizarre joke.

“I don’t want to waste it, there’s still plenty left, it’s still perfectly good…”

Romney seemed genuinely confused by their refusal. His hot chocolate was so good he didn’t want to waste it, but it wasn’t so good that it was worth tipping those who made it. “I think the important part of this story isn’t the tipping,” my brother explained. “It’s that he doesn’t understand that everyone else is throwing their unused drinks away because they understand that it’s against social norms. In his mind, his millionaire saliva is good enough that it shouldn’t bother a barista of the serving class.”

Creepy and an Ewwwwww Factor off the charts!

And you know what.  I believe it.