Courtesy of  Brigham Young University–Idaho comes this creepy and hysterical public service message to male students urging them to identify friends they think are masturbating too much to religious officials, and comparing the gesture to rescuing a fellow soldier during war.

“If you need to, talk to your bishop,” school president Kim B. Clark says in the video, “Wounded On The Battlefield,” aka “Saving Private Hardon” which was released last month. “Tell someone who can do something that you have a friend in trouble.”

 “A lonely, confused young man gets addicted to pornography. His roommates know, but they do nothing to help him.”

Jeez, guys, can’t somebody just lend the poor guy a hand?