“I Mean…Aren’t We All Vers Anyway?”


Sly Merritt has a BA in psychology/sociology. MA in clinical psychology. He's a flip flop wearing hippy with a peaceloving mindset. Even pacifists like him know when it's time to do all we can for LGBTQ equality. Sly's views are all opinions not advice.

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2 Responses

  1. Chaz says:

    I too used to think that men in certain sexual roles in a gay relationship fitted into certain stereotypes i.e. bottom = effeminate and top = masculine. But then I soon understood this was incorrect. In conversations with friends I soon realized that contrary to popular belief, if anything, men in the submissive role sexually actually hold the “power” (whether you prefer a certain sexual role or are flexible). A friend put it very well once explaining that in a heterosexual relationship it is the woman that holds all the cards despite what is usually perceived. “They control the access” as she so eloquently put it.

    I think those who are in relationships where both partners want to explore and try new things are lucky. But we all know that relationships are nuanced and strange and beautiful and perplexing and fulfilling.

    I deeply love my husband of many many years but alas sex is something we have never really truly clicked in. I want/wanted to take that journey with him but it is just not at all something he thinks or cares about. I would be lying if I did not say it was disappointing and frustrating, but relationships come in many guises and we all plot our way through them and sometimes often overcompensate in other ways. And on that note… more cookies anyone 🙂

  1. April 1, 2013

    […] correcting those ill-conceived beliefs into the community. As I’ve stated before, we have to take accountability for not repeating the mistakes we advocate against. Basically, […]

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