Watch The Trailer: Tim Burton’s “Dark Shadows” Remake. It SUCKS!

Will Kohler

Will Kohler is a noted LGBT historian, writer, blogger and owner of Back2Stonewall.com. A longtime gay activist, Will fought on the front lines of the AIDS epidemic with ACT-UP and continues fighting today for LGBT acceptance and full equality. Will’s work has been referenced in notable media venues as MSNBC and BBC News, The Washington Post, The Advocate, The Daily Beast, Hollywood Reporter, Raw Story, and The Huffington Post

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7 Responses

  1. Cindy says:

    I am old enough to remember the original Dark Shadows, which I ran home from school to watch every single day. I loved the 1991 television remake and mourned its early demise. I thrilled to hear a movie was in the works. But this, this is a travesty! Good god Burton. What were you thinking?! Fangs for nothing, indeed!

  2. Bobmorgret says:

    What a complete slap in the face to all the fans of the original I for one won’t waste my money going to see this piece of shit…Dark Shadows a comedy gimme a f**kn break!

    • DrCroland says:

      Well, if it’s Tim Burton, what do you expect? He’s nuts, he can’t help himself… he has a one-track mind and all his productions basically look the same… a different director might’ve done a better job. Maybe, I don’t know… Hollywood has become a very mediocre place, taken over by schlock directors like Burton!

  3. Artamus says:

    Tim Burton is becoming very proficient at giving the middle finger salute to fans of whatever original movie, book, or show he’s currently defecating on, Dark Shadows being just the latest receptacle for his ever growing steaming pile. The irksome part is, even if this thing flops as badly as it so richly deserves to, his career will not be harmed one bit by it. He’ll simply laugh all the way to the bank, and move on to his next victim.(which of course will star Johnny Depp, and Helena Bonham Carter.) Yes Virginia, Satanic blood pacts do exist – Tim Burton is solid proof of that!

  4. Gordon Wagner says:

    That looks like a real dog of a movie. What a disappointment. I was hoping for something rather dark. That would at least take itself seriously.

  5. John Williamson says:

    Remakes! Re-imagining! Reshits!

    Looks to be Tim Burton’s grand opus of raping our past. One of those movie magazines stated “Tim and Johnny love Dark Shadows more than any other fans do.” I’m never been a hardcore fan of Dark Shadows but I do appreciate the gothic environment, well-developed characters and storylines; and this series was for all intents and purposes the small screen’s horror counterpart to Doctor Who. Burton’s film looks to be a silly-ass comedy aimed at juveniles and making fun of vampires and the series. If I was a DS fan I’d feel like I was being slapped in the face, dicked up the ass, and $10 or whatever it costs for a movie these days stolen out of my wallet! Apparently Burton’s true vision, finally revealed, is that old series and movies are to be Laughed At for having been made on a shoestring budget! Fans of old series and movies Do Not Take Them As Jokes. They take the material Seriously as they do the characters. Burton sees the media of the past through the same eyes as the Mystery Science Theater 3000 morons do: shit to be laughed at and made fun of! Johnny Depp and Tim Burton can both go to hell. I’ve had my share of them and the morons they cater to. Hollywood has impregnated Depp with star power to the extent that they believe he is the Only actor capable of playing eccentric or unique characters. Oh, Please! As if there aren’t a Billion eager actors out there incapable of filling his shoes, and probably many of them Better actors–but not one of them is given the chance because of Depp’s screen-hogging and the golden niche they’ve carved out for him! Yeah, I’m sick and tired of the whole Hollywood business.

  6. Booba says:

    Tim Burton, Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter. Code word: C.R.A.P.

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